Episode 501 Brandon Mancine Strength Is a Choice You Make Transcript
This transcript is from episode 501 with guest Brandon Mancine.
Scott DeLuzio: [00:00:00] Ever feel like your body’s breaking down before you even hit 40 years old? Maybe your knees ache every morning or you’re one bad day away from thinking the gym’s just not for you anymore. Add that to the mental weight of the transition out of the military, and it’s easy to feel like your best days are behind you.
But what if you could flip the script? What if the pain you feel today is a foundation for the comeback story you’re meant to write? That’s what this episode is about. Marine veteran and strength coach Brandon Mancini was crushed literally between two trucks. Doctors told him he’d never squat again. 16 months later, he proved them wrong.
Not only did he rebuild his body, but he used the same mindset to extend grace to the man who almost took his leg. Brendan breaks down how strength isn’t just physical, it’s mental, it’s emotional, and spiritual. And the stronger you are in those areas, the more dependable you become for your family, for your friends, and most [00:01:00] importantly for yourself.
We’re gonna get into all that in just a minute, but before we dive in, make sure you’re subscribed to the email newsletter at driveonpodcast.com/subscribe You’ll get my five favorite episodes sent straight to your inbox. No fluff, just the best insights to help you drive on. I also wanna take a moment to raise awareness for something deeply important to our community.
The Global War on Terrorism Memorial Foundation. This organization is working to build a permanent national memorial in Washington DC to honor the service members, families, and civilians impacted by the global war on terrorism. This memorial serves as. Both a tribute to those who served and a way to ensure their sacrifices are recognized and remembered for generations to come.
If you wanna learn more or find out how you can support the mission, visit gwotmemorialfoundation.org Now, let’s get into today’s episode.
[00:02:00]
Scott DeLuzio: Brandon, welcome to the show. It’s great to have you here. Really looking forward to our conversation, but glad to have you.
Brandon Mancine: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Glad to be here.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, absolutely. So you’ve been nicknamed a real life Wolverine due to your recovery from a tragic accident in 2017. Can you talk a little bit about that experience and kinda what it taught you about resilience and kind of how you bounce back from that?
Brandon Mancine: Yeah, sure. So I was 40 years old three months into my 40th year. I’ve been a personal trainer. Coach since 2001, so was, you know, coming up on 20 years at that time. And early in my career, I, I was really lucky to have some you know, in 2001 was when CrossFit was kind of becoming a thing and, everybody was, you know, in, in gyms we’re [00:03:00] standing on top of boots, balls and all that stuff. And I was really fortunate to have some mentors early in my career that taught me that if people want to do that stuff, awesome. Help them. I. Get better at that. ’cause that’s important to them. But make sure you are making them better athletes for their sport.
For most people, that’s the sport of life, right? So more days in your life, more life in your days. Make sure they can live well into their golden years. And that comes down to, you know. Strength and conditioning, the, the basic boring stuff that, that helps you be a better athlete for life. So, having, you know, done that for almost two decades at that point when the accident happened in November of 2017.
What had happened was I was pinned between two trucks by an intoxicated driver. The, he was driving an F-150 and he hit me and pinned me between the front of his truck and the back of my Jeep. It was November 20th, 2017. The day before that, [00:04:00] November 19th again, at four years old, I was squatting 4 0 5 and did a for those who did CrossFit, a workout called Power Elizabeth.
And at 40 years old, I was in downtown San Antonio was outperforming 20 year olds in that g so the guy’s half my age. So at that point I was arguably in, in some of the best shape of my life. Now I still have the rear bumper off that Jeep and it’s got my leg print in it. So when I got to the hospital the paramedics on the taking me in the way to the hospital called my wife and told me my leg and my hip were broken.
’cause that’s what they expected with what they saw at the, the accident seat. When they got there, I found out I had severe cross syndrome and compartment syndrome, all the muscles of the right leg and three severe bone bruises, but no breaks. So now coincidentally, one of the nurses in the ICU that I was in for that week was a member at one of the gyms that I coached at.
And if you know anything about [00:05:00] CrossFitters, they’re gonna tell you. Gonna find every reason to tell you why you should come in and do CrossFit, right? So he was saying, see you guys, this is what happens. And that was the first, one of the first times I was nicknamed The Real Life Wolf Marine. ’cause the the, the just the fact that the, my bones didn’t break right.
And that was great for my ego, right as I couldn’t walk was laid up in the, in the hospital bed. But then there was this moment where because again, that. He was telling everybody like, this is, you know, this is the coach and he’s, you know, one of the best guys in the gym and this is why you do crossfitted.
It makes you hard to kill, is another thing CrossFitters loves say, right? Which any well intelligently followed exercise program will do that for you. Strength needs to be the bulk of that program. Then the the doctor in charge came in at one point and she said, look, Mr. Manni you do your exercise and strength history, I. [00:06:00] You fair this accident better than most would have. There’s, you know, a percentage of the population that would’ve lost their leg in this accident. Most people would’ve had breaks, and you’d have that, you recover better than most, but you need to understand those days exercise are behind you. And I understand e especially in hindsight, that her intention was to, to help ease my mind and help me adapt back to life better.
But I also knew if my own mental wellbeing. I needed to set the precedent for who I was and what I was gonna do. So, I told her, I asked her, who’s in charge of my healthcare? And the look on her face instantly told me she thought I was asking, where’s the man in charge? I. Which she’s, you know, if somebody takes attitude towards a woman who’s put in that time and effort to become a doctor, they’re fully justified and, and being upset.
So she said, I’m in charge. Are you okay with that? I said, no, ma’am, you’re not. I’m in charge of my healthcare. You’re a consultant. I will squat 4 0 5 again. So it was, you know, a kind of [00:07:00] a funny misunderstanding. But, but I, I knew I needed to set that precedent for who I was and what I was gonna do. And so. The months after that, it took me 16 months to get back to scoring 4 0 5. In the months after that, I basically took everything I knew could have helped people over my career recover from injuries. But I took everything I knew I dug into, I. A lot, but two main sources were Charles Quin and, and everything, you know, he had talked about and written and researched about helping athletes recover as quickly as possible, and Dr.
Patrick was putting out a lot of stuff at that time. So I was really leaning heavily on those two. A lot of supplementation. I think at one point I was up to like 80 pills a day, and, you know, three shake of collagen, a lot of real food, and just literal and figurative. One step at a time, like doing everything I had to do because at first, so November 19th, 2017, 4 0 [00:08:00] 5, and Pat Elizabeth was the workout.
November 21st, 2017, it was 10 steps with Walker and I had to lay back down, put my leg back up ’cause my leg felt like it was gonna explode if it was below a hip for more than 10 seconds. So it’s the principles of how you get in better shape and how you recondition your body don’t change the degree to which you apply them do.
And that’s that’s what got me to the point where I was able to withstand an accident and, and try like that physically. And that’s what got me to the point where I was able to recover from it.
Scott DeLuzio: That, and that recovery piece that you talked about, I, I think is important to kind of hone in on because your physical condition prior to that accident, like right up. Until that, that moment of that accident allowed you to be able to recover in the way that you did. I, I believe and at least set you up for success.
Not to say that somebody else couldn’t have [00:09:00] recovered, but you would’ve had probably much more s severe injuries had you not been in such good shape up at, at that point. And this is not the, the first. Yeah, this is not the first story that I’ve heard of somebody who had been in great shape and came back from something that they, you know, by all rights, you know, probably shouldn’t have come back from, at least not, you know, the way that they ended up coming
Brandon Mancine: hold on.
Scott DeLuzio: Right.
Brandon Mancine: So I did another podcast recently and a guy said the comeback was extraordinary and you, what you said right there was, shouldn’t be able to. I disagree.
Scott DeLuzio: Okay.
Brandon Mancine: Human body is incredibly resilient. It can come back from some pretty incredible things. So this is where, how I got into if I can go off on a little bit of a tangent, Scott, when I got outta the Marines.
Scott DeLuzio: Go ahead. Go ahead.
Brandon Mancine: So, I went to bootcamp four days after graduating high school. That was 96. I got out [00:10:00] in June of 2000, so I was machine gunner, marine corps infantry, machine gunner, and then I got to work in special operations with fast company. So those four years beat the hell out of my body pretty good. So when I got out at 23 years old, I couldn’t run 50 yards without my knees just screaming at me. Didn’t run more than 50 yards. So at that time I’d kind of resigned to, I was gonna be the guy that just did upper body and then for legs I would do the, you know, the bike or elliptical or, or something like that. Just could do the step mill either. And I was living in Norfolk, Virginia, but going to school there.
And working out at YMCA there, and there was a trainer who came from a Marine Corps family and we, you know, just started talking to him in the gym. And you know, he. I asked about my time in service and you know, I made a joke or something at one point. Yeah. You know, I just can’t do squats or [00:11:00] stuff anymore.
You know, knees are shot and you start asking me questions like, oh, okay, when do your knees hurt? And when when do they not hurt? And at what degree? And, you know, do a squat from, when do they start to hurt? Just he was sesame. I didn’t. Note at the time. And then we, we, you know, again, from Marine Corps family, he’s really interested in my time in service and at some point he asked me, do you want to be able to run again? And I just, I never even considered the question, right. I was like, well, I just know my knees are shot. I, yeah, sure man, but. I can’t, you know, I, the VA doc, my, when I was you know, checking out was like, oh, you’ll probably need surgery on these knees in the next five, 10 years. Right. And I, so a doctor told me that I just accepted it’s true.
So, I. He was like, look man, I know you probably can’t afford me, but I got a soft spot in my heart for Marines. Like I have so many people in my family who served in the Marine Corps. Let’s meet up once a week and let me give you, let me give you a program that I think will help make your knees stronger. [00:12:00] So I took advantage of that and three months later I could run three miles. Not pain free, but I could do it. So he taught me that. About exercise and nutrition as regenerative therapies to help increase the capabilities of your body. Not, you know, at, in my early twenties, what I was picturing is every workout was just a rocky montage where I beat the shit outta myself, right? And so I’ve heard it, you know, said. More recently, we need more 20 year olds working out like 40 and less 40 year olds working out like they’re 20, right? It’s understanding what your body’s capable of and, and using some basic exercise principles to not easy but simple exercise principles to increase those abilities to achieve whatever the hell is you wanna achieve.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah. You know, I, I think I, I agree with your, your, your point there that you made, and, and thank you for, you know, kind of correcting what I was saying. I, I think my point [00:13:00] was somebody who may not have been in as good a shape, maybe their legs would’ve broken in a way, you know, and torn things at.
Maybe weren’t repairable. Let, let’s put it that way. I, I don’t know you know, the, the exact details and the exact medical you know, issues behind it. But that was the type of thing I was, I was more referring to. In, in, in those cases, you know, tho those people, I. Had they not been in in great shape, they, they may not be able to you know, work their way back.
If, if those things were like physically broken in beyond repair, that, that’s kind of what I, I was talking about. And I’ve, I’ve known people who have had like stage four cancer and they had to under, in, in order for them to beat that, they had to undergo a level of chemo that. Might kill other people that that level of you know, the, the drugs, right?
But they were in such great shape that they were able to survive that. So that’s kind of the, the
Brandon Mancine: bring that up. I don’t know if, [00:14:00] if you’ve seen, but there have been studies that come out recently, say, one of the greatest predictors of whether or not you survive cancer. Not only, but one of the greatest predictors of whether or not you survive a cancer diagnosis is how much muscle mass you have going into it.
There’s a lot of people, the fitness industry that are saying like your, your muscle mass is kind of your health 401k savings account, right. The, the. More. You build up the the, the, the more, the better you’re gonna be able to stand. It’s not just simply muscle mass, like it’s what else comes along with it.
Ligament and tend get, they’re, they get more 10 cell strength, bone density increases.
Scott DeLuzio: Right.
Brandon Mancine: Let’s talk about what is strength. If, if I can ask you that question, Scott, what would you, if somebody said, Hey, what is, define strength for me? What would you say? I.
Scott DeLuzio: Well, some of the things you just mentioned, I, I would, I would consider, obviously the, the muscle mass would be part of it. The the ability to [00:15:00] lift certain weights depends on those muscles, and also the ligaments and tendons and, and the strength of, of all those combined. I, I think that that’s, that’s part of it, right.
Brandon Mancine: And, and I kind of primed you for speaking only in the, in the physical sense, right. Unintentionally. Right. But it is, as I define strength, it is the ability of a position or a pattern to maintain its integrity under increasing stress or load, right? So we talk about the physical sense squat, hinge, push pull, lunge carry, like moving in bio, those biomechanically sound movements form to say that the layman’s terms, right?
The stronger you are, the better you can maintain the integrity of those positions or patterns and increase the load. You can carry the stress, you can put on those positions or patterns, but we can take that definition and overlay it to a. Your political positions, right? Do they hold up to debate? Do they hold up under stress?
Your religious positions, do they hold up to debate and stress [00:16:00] your relationship, right? Your relationships your emotional stability does it hold up stress? And the way you increase the strength of all these different aspects of your life is to get outside your comfort zone and learn to deal with greater stress.
And I am telling you, man, that the, the, these principles are best learned in the physical realm in working in what, as you know, the hashtag I put on my social media posts is get strong and do stuff, and that’s the get strong and do shit sometimes, whatever mood. The, however, the mood strikes me, right? So, it, it’s, yeah. Yeah. It that kind of, that that sums it up. It, you’re able to learn those principles and expand them into other aspects of your life through, through the physical development side of it.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah. And that kind of leads into the next thing I wanted to talk about was kind of more the the mental side of things, because there’s. Obviously probably a mental hit that you took. Like when you’re sitting there in the, the hospital room [00:17:00] and the doctor is telling you that, you know, you’re, you’re probably never gonna get back to that 4 0 5 you know, lifting or, you know, you’re not gonna be able to do any of that kind of stuff.
I would imagine if this was me at first, I’d be like, oh shit. Like, I’m, I’m out of it. I’m, I’m out of the game. And, but then what, what? Kind of triggered in you to say, hold up. No, that’s not gonna be the case.
Brandon Mancine: So back to that.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah.
Brandon Mancine: How I’ve put it into practice in my life. Because we can, I talked about what I talked about, the physical, the, the, the political, the religious, the, the, I talked about relationships. So we can talk about your support system. Right. And I’ve, I’ve learned early in my life that. It’s critical to have a strong support system.
When I sit down and talk to a potential client, I don’t talk about goals first. I don’t talk about exercise history first. I don’t even talk about injury history [00:18:00] first. The first thing I want to hear about is your support system, right? Because regardless of how often I’m talking to you, there’s 160 hours in the week.
That might be wrong, but there’s a lot of hours in
Scott DeLuzio: Somewhere around there. That sounds right.
Brandon Mancine: of hours in the week. So, who else are you talking to? Right? And we, I, I, so I like to talk to people about their supporters and how to engage with them and their detractors, how to put them at bay. And most importantly, the thing keep in mind is you do not have a support system.
You are part of a support system, right? It’s, you know, this whole idea, everybody wants to talk about, I, I need to build independence. That’s what they like to, you know, everybody. I’m independent. Great. You’re alone. That’s what I hear. I, I focus on being dependable, right? I’m teaching my kids to be dependable and to surround yourself with dependable people.
’cause no [00:19:00] man is an island. No man is self-made. So. There’s, you have to be strong in just about all aspects of your no, in all aspects of your life. You have to be strong in order to be dependable and, and for people to see you as valuable and have wanting to, to have you in, in their sort system. So
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah.
Brandon Mancine: the and, and if I could go onto, there’s a side of this story about the accident that, that I, I really.
Want more people to understand what the, the kid that hit me was intoxicated. He was speaking plainly high off his ass. I remember when the, after the hit, when the vehicles came apart, I looked back. The way I described the way he looked is if you were trying to make fun of somebody that was too high, it was almost like he was literally swatting the birdies from around his head.
Scott DeLuzio: Oh wow.
Brandon Mancine: when you. When you hit a person, not a car, when you hit a person with a vehicle in [00:20:00] Texas and you’re intoxicated, it is considered intended to kill. Legally, you’re automatically a felon. And there’s what, eight, I think five, maybe eight years in prison. Something like that. I can’t remember. Now when I’m first at the hospital, you know, my wife is there and I’m, you know, pretty much useless to her at this point.
And, you know, there’s so many things I needed to do in my businesses and I can’t now. So the first thought is, of course, yeah, put ’em in jail. Let ’em rot, bury ’em under the jail. All I care, I don’t, but then, you know. I still had my leg. My leg wasn’t broken. I think back to when I was in high school. So I mentioned earlier, I left bootcamp four days after graduating high school.
That summer I was away at bootcamp. I had friends in one of two categories. They died or they went to jail. I was a knucklehead, right? That could’ve been me. So then, this is around the time my wife and I were first starting to have [00:21:00] kids, uh uh, we’re trying to, to have kids at that point. I now have two beautiful kids. I’m thinking, I’m getting ready to bring kids in this world, and this kid that hit me is a wrecking ball moving through the world, just fucking up people’s lus. He had, you know, a pretty decent rap sheet. So when I got to meet with the assistant district attorney, I said, look I’ve had deferred adjudication on tickets before where I go before the judge and they say, okay, you go do this online course that is magically gonna make you a better driver and will this ticket, you know, never happen.
So I said, can we do deferred adjudication on his felony status pending a four successful four year enlistment? Marine Corps infantry only ’cause. You know, I always make the joke, the Marine Corps is the best mistake I ever made. Right? It, it saved my life, but it, it, and all kidding aside, it put me in touch with some of the best people I’ve ever met.
Right. I’m still in touch with a lot of ’em today. Some of them were on the phone, my wife [00:22:00] before some of my family was on the phone with my wife after this accident. So they’re just, they’re my big part of my support system. Right. So, and I was told, I. That they couldn’t do that because it’s unconstitutional.
And I remember sitting there and saying, look, I, can you explain to me how giving someone a second chance, specifically through the act of serving their country, can you explain to me how that’s unconstitutional? So it, it I wouldn’t have, I don’t know if I would’ve had the ability to extend that grace or to try and extend that grace if I, if I had lost my leg or even if it had been broken up into pieces.
Right. So again, that is, and that comes back to you. I don’t know if how far you wanna get into faith here, but I’m gonna do it anyway. Like the,
Scott DeLuzio: Sure, go ahead.
Brandon Mancine: The, the scripture of Matthew five five and the misunder halford years, I, I misunderstood that verse. It’s the meek show, inherit the earth is how [00:23:00] it’s commonly said.
We go back to the original text. It is more accurately, the gentle or the humble show inherit the earth. Now, you can’t be gentle if you’re not strong. Right. The declawed kitten that’s pawing at your face, it feels gentle. That kitten’s trying to kill you. Right. But it can’t ’cause it’s not strong, right?
So the, the, the fact that this kid hit me with his dead truck had no insurance. The insurance insurance had lasted on that truck two days prior. So it’s left the bag on, on the financial side as well. hit me, pinned me between two cars and fucked up his life more than he did mine. So the fact that I had that strength built up in several aspects of my life, I was able to extend that grace.
Now the, the district attorney, when I brought that up multiple times, he said, look, I told you it’s not an option, but here’s what I’ll do. I will run it up the chain until someone tells me shut up. But the first thing I had to [00:24:00] do is go present it to his side. And what he did, I couldn’t believe this the young man said no, I’m not interested. Would rather choose felony status. And that’s where you know, you offer all you can people, but if, if someone is simple principle, I tell my clients I cannot care about your goals more than you do.
Scott DeLuzio: That’s right.
Brandon Mancine: Like, I, I care, I do, but if I care more than you guess what’s not gonna happen, right? You’re not gonna
Scott DeLuzio: Right.
Brandon Mancine: Right?
Scott DeLuzio: And that, that’s the, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make a drink, you
Brandon Mancine: Another way to say
Scott DeLuzio: Right. That, that it’s exactly what, what it seems like happened here. It’s like that in, in my mind, like when you said that, it seemed probably to him, I. I don’t know this guy, I don’t, you know, this is just me making an out of the blue assumption here, but like, well, the Marine Corps sounds like a whole lot more work than sitting in jail, even though it’s more time sitting in [00:25:00] jail.
It seems like a lot of work and I probably just don’t want to do it. And that, that, that’s maybe the attitude that, that he might have had. Right.
Brandon Mancine: So, yeah, so at the sentencing, you know, he was, you know, I, I wanna make this right by this man. You know, and I remember at one point he said, like, my girlfriend’s about to come into some money and we can give it all to him. And I said, look, you wanna make this right by me. As I, you know, I, I, I think I said earlier, he was wrecking ball moving through this world.
I was like, stop being wrecking ball, moving through this world. Money is not gonna do it. I can, I can get money, you know. Stop being rag ball, moving through this world. Take some ownership. I gave him a copy of Jock’s book extreme Ownership. I said, good luck. I, I hope you’d start making better decisions. And that’s, again, I, I did everything I think I could be expected to do for him. And I’m one to my life. I’ve got my support system. I have to be dependable for, you know, to come back to that. And I have to work on making sure they’re taken care of.
Scott DeLuzio: [00:26:00] Well. Going back to what you were saying earlier, that the, on the physical side that you are building kind of like your, your 401k for your body by, by getting in that healthy shape and you now have that nest egg, if you will, to be able to kind of bounce back and, and be able to be stronger and, and carry heavier loads and do better things physically but also mentally.
And. You’re doing those, those same types of types of things and you, you just described it very well, you know how your mental state was, you know, initially like, screw the guy, but you know, then, oh, let’s actually think about this and put some logic to it and you know, try to help the guy if you can.
But you know that that type of of person is the type of person that you want in your corner. Is the, the person who not only is physically strong, but mentally strong as well, who can be there for you in difficult times, where, you know, maybe you’re having, relationship [00:27:00] problems or something like that.
Well, maybe you can have this third party person come in, you know, who’s in your circle, who can talk to you and, and try to help you work through the problems. ’cause sometimes when you’re in the middle of whatever those problems are in your, in your life, you’re not thinking so clearly. And so if you could have that, that person that you can lean on.
Brandon Mancine: the Jar. I’ve, I’ve heard
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, exactly.
Brandon Mancine: the label from inside the jar. Yeah.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, that’s a good way to put it. You know? But, but that person on the outside, they, they can, they can read that label and, and they can hopefully help you work your way through. Whatever problem it happens to be. But again, to your point that you said before, nobody’s gonna care more than that, whoever the problem is you know who, nobody’s gonna care more about it than that person.
You, you should be the one who cares the most about your own problems, your own situation. Nobody, you can’t expect anyone else to. So, and that, that includes your spouse, that includes your best friend, that includes the government, that includes everybody. You know, like [00:28:00] nobody’s gonna care more than you,
Brandon Mancine: some caveats there. Like I think with do you have, do you have kids?
Scott DeLuzio: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I have three kids.
Brandon Mancine: I, I will say, you know, there’s a, a lesson in theology in having kids too, man, in that, you know, this thing that came from me and I, I love it so much and it just won’t listen all the time.
Scott DeLuzio: Right.
Brandon Mancine: so it’s, you know, I, I, there are some times when I feel like.
You know, I, I want that their goals for them so much more than they do. And it’s, it’s, that’s definitely when it’s a challenge to not step in and, and over parent and let them make their mistakes. And and then, so there, there it’s more, you know, it’s, it’s it’s being the lighthouse and be trying to model and let me let. Let me just, just be honest for a second. Which I’m, I’m trying to be honest all the way through. I’m not a saint, right? The as I said with the example, the young man hit me, my first response was, that guy. Right? [00:29:00] That was my initial response. And, and even, even as I was, you know, this base I was forced to take where I could do nothing but lie there. Think about what’s next? What do I want? Right? I’m thinking about what do I want physically? Am I done with getting stronger and, and, and being an athlete? And you know, I, boxing was my sport. I love it. Am I, do I, do I wanna be able to spark? Do I wanna be able to hit a back? Yeah, I fucking do. So anybody says I can’t.
No, they’re wrong and I need to admit that. Right. And then I’m, I’m getting ready to have kids. What do I wanna do with them? Well, I, I, I want, you know, I wanna show Grace. I want this world to be a better place. Alright? I can’t just say fuck it and throw this guy in jail. I have to, I. I, I have to find a way that everybody that is, has the opportunity to get better outta it.
’cause what is the most likely scenario of him [00:30:00] just being thrown into jail? Well, he comes either a better, more efficient, or at least more active criminal. Right? That’s what most likely happens, right? What do I get of that? He had no money to give me a, there was nothing to to sue for. I get some senseless suffering made worse, guy’s.
Life was shit anyway. It, it, it was, I I, I’m just, I’m, I’m, I wanna be clear, I’m, I’m not a saint. When I’m driving down the road and somebody’s driving slow in the left lane, man, I have some choice words for them. Right. And I wish they would go to jail, but, right. Of course. I’m joke. But so I, I want to be clear, you know, about who I’m, and just, it, it was the space that I was forced to take that gave me the, the, the opportunity to realize what I think was the best option for me in that scenario. And I have no guilt about anything that, that I, I feel I, I handled it best, so I. But then that’s, [00:31:00] you know, when those times do come up when I’m like, you know, in traffic, fuck this guy.
Get outta it’s, it’s a nice reminder to, to come back to just focus on what I need to do, where I’m going, who I’m responsible for, and, and what I want to get out of this day in this moment.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, and you know, thinking about. What you’re talking about with, with kids, yeah. Sometimes it’s frustrating, right? But I think as parents, we should strive to try to be that good example that those kids can then, i, I mean, kids generally try to, you know, emulate like whatever it is that their parents do.
They, they sometimes make the same you know, mannerisms and, and use the same words. So you kinda have to watch what you say around your kids sometimes. And, you know, you all those things, they, they learn just by observing. I mean, that’s how they, they learn to speak, you know, they hear you speaking and, and they.
Just try to mimic the sounds [00:32:00] that you’re making to get the things that you’re, you’re doing. They, they try to just mimic all those things. And then when, when you are faced with a difficult decision or a difficult circumstance in your life, like the one that you just described with the accident and, and this guy trying to help ’em in some way and show some grace towards him, that’s something that a, a kid’s gonna look at and be like.
Dad could have gone one or two ways of, of this. He, he could have just let the guy go to jail and let the system do what it’s gonna do. Or he could have tried to be nice to this guy and I guess that’s the right thing to do. So, ’cause dad did it and dad’s a good guy, so I’m gonna try to be more like dad and I’ll be, I’ll be nice like that too, you know?
Brandon Mancine: Yeah, so go back to what I was saying about the, the lighthouse and so in, in all aspects of life, my, my son from, you know. was, he’s six now. He’s born when I was 41. He’s never, he’s only knows we, this family works out right. He, we, when he was in the Johnny [00:33:00] up sitting in the home di and he was watching, my wife and I work out and my daughter, she only knows that she’s seeing us working out as a family in there.
And now they, you know, she’s turning four. Next month he’s six and they’ll say, dad, let’s go in the gym. And we go out there and I might get some of the workout in, but a lot of times I’m just, you know, showing them what to do and then, and then watch ’em do it. Yeah. And now that’s all they know. Right.
And it’s all they’ll ever know. And, and you know, in other aspects, like when I make a mistake, like, you know, again, not a perfect path. There’s times when I’ve yelled where I shouldn’t have. And I step aside, take a breath and I go back in there, Hey, daddy was wrong. You know, I yelled because I was upset and I lost control of myself and it’s got nothing to do with you guys.
And then even when I’m like having challenges, like in, you know, running a business and you know about this, there’s times you to make phone calls you don’t wanna make. And I’ll, I’ll talk to be like, Hey. Daddy got this phone call he gotta make today. [00:34:00] He’s not looking forward to it. There’s gonna be some challenges there and, you know, send him off to school and then come back and Daddy made that phone call and it went great or it didn’t go great.
Here’s what I can learn. Here’s what I do next time. So talk about life is about learning, getting better. So now you know, when my son’s and wrestling and my daughters and do gymnastics and they go and they mess up and, okay, well what did you learn? And they understand that concept because I’ve, they’ve seen me do it and they’ve.
Heard talk through how I do it. So it’s you know, yeah. Teaching them being that lighthouse in, in all those, those aspects and, and it life is about getting better.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, exactly. My a couple weeks ago, I, I was building a bookshelf with my daughter. We’re from scratch. We went to the, went to the store, got the wood, you know, we, we put it all together, drew it out like how we wanted to make it and everything. And I. Got to a point like partway through it where things just weren’t fitting together, right?
It just wasn’t quite going the [00:35:00] way it was. And I was, I was getting frustrated and I, I was thinking to myself, this can go one of two ways. I can take a hammer to this damn thing and just smash the shit out of it and just say, screw it. We’re not doing this. Or I could take a minute, take a breath, figure out what went wrong.
Undo that thing that went wrong and get back into it and show her that, Hey, this is, this is something that’s, it’s difficult, but it’s not impossible. And as long as you don’t give up on it and you, you think through the problem and you, you try to figure it out, you’ll end up with, I. You know, the, the end goal that you’re, you’re trying to go for.
And that’s it, that’s what we did. And, and she’s, she’s an avid reader. She’s, she’s 12 years old, and she reads like crazy. She has hundreds of books. Like, I’m, I’m looking at your background behind you. And I’m like, she would, she would die to have, you know, background like this. And you know, and, and so she just ran, ran outta space.
So we were just, we, I was like, Hey, let’s just do it. Let’s build it together. And it was, it was a cool [00:36:00] thing that we got to do together.
Brandon Mancine: I’m sorry to be laughing
Scott DeLuzio: go ahead.
Brandon Mancine: but, but it’s just reminding me because of this, so before we had kids, I built this bookshelf my wife and I built it and there was a moment where I was, I guess this is before kids, and I was telling her I. We’re just gonna take it out back and set it on fire.
I’m fucking done with this thing. Right? And so obviously that didn’t happen. We’ve got this beautiful bookshelf that has a, a funny story. But yeah, it’s, it’s there’s, yeah, definitely been, you know, project there was one together an ikea, which that should be easy, right? Dresser for my son, just one of the first pieces I put backwards and I didn’t realize it until we were like, the next, the last step.
I tear it all apart and it’s like, yeah, man.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, those types of projects can definitely test your patients. And you know, it’s, I think it’s important to, you know, especially as a [00:37:00] parent to recognize that you might have little ones nearby and they, they are like sponges and they will absorb everything good and bad. When, when I came back from Afghanistan, I was not the, the nicest person in the world.
And my son, he was young at the time, and he would, when he would get frustrated at something, he would make the same like grimacing face. Like I, it kinda like gripped my teeth and the same face that I would make when I would get frustrated at something and I, I looked at him and I was like. Oh my God, do I really look that that bad?
And I, I, I couldn’t believe it. That’s what I was, I was passing onto and I was like, I gotta, I gotta do something to change. ’cause I, I can’t, I can’t let this kid grow up that way, you know? And, and fortunately he, he turned out okay. But, you know, it’s, you know, it, it was one of those things where, where after seeing that I was like, man, I can’t believe what I’m doing.
Like this, this is, this is crazy. I gotta kind of snap out of it. But, but it all goes back to what you were talking about, about being stronger, being better, you know, always working on improving yourself. And [00:38:00] yeah, sometimes life’s gonna throw you some hits. You’re going to, you’re gonna have a traumatic event like the, the car accident that you described.
Or, you know, somebody’s gonna come back from a combat situation and they’re, they’re gonna be maybe messed up, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t bounce back from it. That doesn’t mean that you can’t have a better future, a better life, you know, and, and show other people that, hey, yeah, sure. I, I took these hits.
I, you know, whether it’s mental, physical, spiritual, you know, whatever it, it happens to be. I took some hits, but I was able to come back and you know, show like this is how I did it. And I think that’s the important piece that, that people need to, to pay attention to, you know?
Brandon Mancine: Man. Totally agree. Yeah. It’s, I, you know, quick side story. Recently I had two clients that had just devastating things happen. One a death in the family. The other one, a family member get really sick. And so they came in for their sessions. You know, the first thing for coach, I didn’t get it done this week, you [00:39:00] know, and they were telling me everything that they fell short on. They both in, in, in different terms that I lost ground, I lost my progress, I lost my gains. I said, hold on. Like, like, that is not the way to look at this. They both had made amazing progress in the months leading up to this. So I told ’em, look, you’re looking at this wrong way. I. It’s not the lost gains. It’s not the lost progress. This is the fruits of your labor on full display. This week. The events of this week were coming. Whether you knew it or not, they were gonna have, you had no impact on whether or not this was happening. But you were a more dependable member of your support system.
Your family is better off because of the shape you were in. One of them had to move all the furniture out of a out of a room by themselves, so some medical equipment could be put in there. I. [00:40:00] They, they would’ve, if they were able to do that, if they, if without all the, the, the, the physical development that they had done over the prior months, if they were able to do that, they would’ve been more prone to injury.
Right. So it’s, it’s, it’s a, it’s a reframing of like when challenges come up. Not what you lost because of the challenges, but how much better you fired them and how much more useful you were to your, the people you love because of that. Right. So it’s, it’s, that’s what, again, coming back to the idea of muscle being a a 401k savings account for you.
Yeah.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah. And, and it’s really that, that resilience and being able to, to bounce back from these setbacks and, and how. How well you’re, you’re able to do that and I, I think for the listeners, you know, maybe, maybe take a look and, and look into your own life and see how well am I bouncing back from these things [00:41:00] And, you know, am I, do I have a network of people you know, a support system that I can rely on to assist me or that I can assist them?
It’d be. To be dependable for as put it in your words you know, are those, are there those people that I can count on to be dependable for me and that I can be dependable for them? And, and we can help each other out? Because if not I gotta imagine it would be pretty difficult to have gone through the experience that you went through all on your own right.
Brandon Mancine: Oh yeah. Yeah, man. I mean, I, I’m, I’m so lucky on that side. My wife did not leave my side once that. Whole week except to you know, go grab you some Chick-fil-A or whenever I, I asked her to. Right. You know, my my clients and my, my circle of friends and my family and my, you know, [00:42:00] brothers from the Marine Corps, like just filled in every single, you know. And, and once we could, we could ask for it that time. It’s just, I’m incredibly, incredibly lucky there.
Scott DeLuzio: That, that’s awesome. Yeah, and, and I think that that just goes. You know, for the listeners that just goes to show that you know, that mindset that a lot of us tend to have, where we we’re like, yeah, you know what? Screw it. I don’t, I don’t need, I don’t need that group. I don’t need those friends. I don’t need that, those people.
And I, I can do it on my own and, you know, I’ll just, I’ll be better off on my own. That, that kind of mindset. Not necessarily true. May maybe, yeah. May maybe you might feel that way. In that moment. Right. And it may feel comfortable, right. But like you were saying before, you gotta push yourself outta that comfort zone.
If you want that growth, you wanna experience growth and you know,
Brandon Mancine: And recognize
Scott DeLuzio: beyond that.
Brandon Mancine: And recognize that people want to help. People want to be useful, you know, so,
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah. Right.
Brandon Mancine: and, [00:43:00] and then you just develop this you know, this, this, cinematic relationship where you’re both better for it, right? So there’s, there’s,
Scott DeLuzio: right.
Brandon Mancine: there’s a, a, a, a difference between codependency and, and coac accountability.
Scott DeLuzio: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I, I agree. Yeah. I, I, I think for the listeners though, you know, the biggest takeaway here is that you can come back from. Setbacks from these negative experiences that you might have in your life. And I, I’ve heard from some people who’ve gone through terrible things like cancer or, or whatever, and they, they came through it and said, you know, it was probably actually one of the best things that ever happened to me because it completely changed my mindset, changed my attitude towards life and towards, you know, the people around me and, and things like that.
And but it’s only if you’re. You’re open to it. If you’re only, only if you’re open [00:44:00] to that type of you know, mindset that that is really going to sink in with you. Right?
Brandon Mancine: it’s, it’s who you become and who you help on the other side, right? So, I mean, you know. My philosophy on exercise, strength conditioning was proven to be extremely fucking effective through this process, not the way I would’ve chosen to prove it. Right. The the, so I made a reel about it, you know, about the the accident, my comeback years ago.
It ended up going viral. And I, I made it and I saved the draft and I was about to delete it. And then I, before I did, I showed it to my wife and I was like, Hey, what do you think about this? And she just started bawling. And I was like, alright, I, I’ve, I’ve gotta post this, right? And so I did, and it started taking off and I started getting so many messages about, thank you for this.
This really inspired me. [00:45:00] A lot of questions, a lot of people, and it’s the internet, so of course I got, you know, questions like, I wish the truck would’ve finished the job. Right. So, ‘ cause
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, sure.
Brandon Mancine: because that’s the
Scott DeLuzio: Because people are assholes.
Brandon Mancine: and you know, maybe it’s just a, a, you know, a. 13-year-old make a joke.
I don’t know,
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah. Right.
Brandon Mancine: just I say that to, that stuff’s always gonna exist. Right? And it’s, it’s where you put your focus. I just put my focus on, you know, helping the people that I, I could help him. Again, same situation with the, the young man hit me. I’ll offer whatever I can. It’s, it’s up to you to work on you.
Scott DeLuzio: Yeah, exactly. Well, to that point of, you know, helping people, you know, in any way that you can for the listeners who are interested in what you do and kind of your, your services and, and things like that, where can people go to check you out and find out more information about you and, and your, and what you do?
Brandon Mancine: So my website [00:46:00] my, my company is Brandon Mancini Fitness. So my website is bmf coaching.com. I’ve got some, you know, freebies you can download on there. The most recent one I’m, I’ve put up there is fat loss made simple. There’s a five able bulletproof core challenge. I got a.
Metabolic assessment you can take on there. It can, you know, help you figure out what’s where’s your area for highest return on opportunity or return on investment or for time you put in you can follow me on social media. Coach Brad Mancini is my, one of my Instagram handles. I have a, a backup, which is just BMF coach.
It’s probably easier to spell. You can find me there. Another one is a real life Wolverine. So those are my three Instagram pages in case any of them get shut down. But yeah, I’ve got a Facebook group get strong and do stuff so you can find me all those areas I do.
Scott DeLuzio: Excellent. Well, I will, oh, go ahead.
Brandon Mancine: I, I, you know, again, I do in-person training but I’m also doing some online coaching.
So if, if I can help you out, wherever you’re in the world, let me know. I.
Scott DeLuzio: [00:47:00] Wonderful. And I’ll put those links in the show notes for the listeners so that they can, they can check you out and hopefully get in touch with you and, and, get stronger and do stuff.
Brandon Mancine: Yes, sir.
Scott DeLuzio: So, thank you. Yeah, thank you Brandon for taking the time to come on sharing your story. I, I, it’s really incredible the, the comeback that you, you had after you know, such a traumatic event.
And hopefully this was inspirational to some of the listeners. So thank you. Thank you again for taking the time to come on.
Brandon Mancine: Thanks for having me, Scott. I, I truly appreciate it.